Pelican Tears

By Dassi Herszberg

Content Warning

Themes of physical restraint, themes of experience in a psychiatric hospital, discussion of emotional distress.

Tied down spread eagle on a cold hard board,
Where the walls have ears,
And the windows talk.
The bed twirls around on a stationary floor,
And my voice has no sound as I call and I call.

 

Warped images and reflections of myself go by,
In crazed, angry shaped mirrors that seem to fly.

 

The ceiling fan limps slowly round and around.
A pelican with a broken wing
Trying to get off the ground.

 

And the freights train
Screams and screeches
Along the tracks in my head.
Billions of words drowning that will never be said.

 

People’s faces,
In and out of focus,
So, so close
Then gone…
Hocus Pocus.

 

Recognize words?
Familiar faces?
No sense can be heard through all the noises.

 

The noise,
Oh the noise!
Just to block my ears!
The pelican is crying bloody tears.
The windows are yelling
And I dare not say a word,
For all the ears are listening,
But I will never be heard.

 

And I am the brunt of the laughter and torment
From the warped crazed
Mirrors,
As I lie
Motionless in bed